SmarterFitter Daily

This is my attempt to keep a daily food and fitness diary. This isn't Pulitzer-winning writing; these are spontaneous, often hastily written rambles of what I eat, do and learn in my ongoing effort to feel awesome all the time. It may not always be pretty, but at least it's honest. You can find more stories and recipes at SmarterFitter.com.

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Day 71

Shrimp tacos

Baked eggs with potato and tomato

Early morning English Muffin

 

The day my appetite came back. But it wasn't a great day. I had a lousy sleep the night before and felt pretty garbagey all day long. I felt perpectually tired, hungry, lethargic, unfocused, depleted... didn't bother counting calories. 

  • Breakfast: English muffin with peanut butter, apples and bananas
  • Snack: Banana strawberry protein smoothie
  • Lunch: Baked eggs with potato, chard and tomatoes
  • Dinner: Shrimp tacos (these were awesome)
  • Dessert: Blackberry & sloe gin sorbet

Day 70

Blackberry & Sloe Gin Sorbet

Energy in:
  • Breakfast: Swiss style muesli with banana, strawberry, yogurt and milk (274 Calories)
  • Lunch: Spaghetti with runner beans, black truffles, garlic, parmesan and rocket (303 Calories)
  • Snack: Banana blackberry protein smoothie (169 Calories)
  • Dinner: Pan-fried tofu with leeks, kale, avocado and sweet corn; blackberry & sloe gin sorbet for dessert (421 Calories)
Energy out:
  • Gym: Swim, 2000m, 50min (-265 Calories)
  • Walk: 35 min stroll (-88 Calories)
Total Calories in: 1,166
Total Calories out: 1,543
Net Calories: -433

Stomach weirdness is easing up but still an issue, particularly in the mornings. Am trying to stick with super simple, uncomplicated meals. Calories still on the low side. Might be a breakfast-before-gym day tomorrow, depending on how I feel first thing.

I've also channeled my late night impulses to eat frozen fruit into something productive: a blackberry sloe gin sorbet (see above). It's intensely flavoured, delicious, and the perfect way to finish off a meal. A little bit goes a long way. 

Muesli with strawberries, bananas and yogurt

Pasta with runner beans, black truffle, parmesan and chilli

Marinated tofu with leeks, kale and corn

Day 69

Baked eggs with potato and tomato

Energy in:
  • Breakfast: Bircher muesli with apple, pears, dried sour cherries, flaxseed, banana and yogurt (272 Calories)
  • Lunch: Baked eggs with spinach, potato, onion, sumac and rocket - delicious, inspired by Ottolenghi's class at the Vegetarian Cookery School (233 Calories)
  • Snackage: Banana, blackberries, yogurt, a dab of strawberry preserves; tea with milk; just before dinner, a refreshing fizzy water with elderflower cordial (homemade!) (226 Calories)
  • Dinner: Grilled tofu and mushroom sandwich with cole slaw and an excess of accoutrements (see below) (410 Calories)
Energy out:
  • Swim: 2000m, 50min (Calories: -266 Calories)
  • Walk: 30min, plus a long cathartic break to pick blackberries (Calories: -75 Calories)

Total Calories in: 1,140
Total Calories out: 1,592
Net Calories: -452


My stomach is feeling funny lately. I'm not sure why. Wasn't I talking about not eating "unusual" foods? I should add "don't eat overly complicated foods" to the list. See I have this problems: it's sandwiches. Or rather, anything that can be consumed with toast. And I go totally overboard. Take tonight's dinner. Sure it looks simple enough: a grilled tofu and mushroom sandwich, with a delicate slice of avocado and tomato. But as I progress through the sandwich, I start getting ideas: "I wonder how ketchup would be... ooh I'd like some mayo... how about a jalapeno kick... does this need onion?"

In the end I over-experiment with flavours and end up with a hodge podge of mis-matched sensations that make the meal somewhat unsatisfying. I think it might also mess with my digestive juices. Or maybe that's just the mass amount of cole slaw I had with my sandwich (raw cabbage - hello?!).

So as a result of this stomach weirdness, my Calorie intake has been a bit low. Which I think made me kind of wonky during my swim today. It felt soooo hard and I though I was rested and awake, I simultaneously felt like I was in a weird daze, sort of detached from my body. 

But I got my 2000m in, and a steam, and then breakfast and coffee, and started to feel more sane. As the day winds down, I hope again that tomorrow my stomach will be back to normal. I used to frequently have days when I was perpetually hungry - I miss that.

Also, did a little look at my nutrient data on caloriecount.about.com (my tool of choice for the job) and notice that I'm consistently low in Iron and Potassium. I also haven't been drinking my daily protein shakes lately which has left my alleged protein requirements way low. Trouble is I'm just not in the mood. I feel bloated and gross as is and protein shakes tend to make me feel super full. Maybe I should just eat a steak.

Bircher muesli

Grilled mushroom and tofu sandwich

Day 68

Frit-ta-ta-ta

Energy in:

  • Pre-breakfast: 4 cherry tomatoes nommed in the car on the way home from The Organic Farm Shop - yes they're that good (12.2 Calories)
  • Breakfast: Sourdough buckwheat pancakes with blackberries and strawberries, stewed in a bit of blackberry/plum jam, plus bananas, walnuts and a pot of hot black tea with milk - major win (337 Calories)
  • Lunch: Veggie split pea soup with spinach and sourdough bread (baked last weekend) with butter (360 Calories)
  • Dinner: Broccoli, red onion and tomato frittata with parmesan; sourdough toast with avocado; rocket and basil on the side (464 Calories)
  • Snack: 1/2 apple, 1/2 pear, herbal tea (46 Calories)

Energy out:

  • Gym: Run/walk + weightlifting (-182 Calories)
  • Walk: 30 min stroll (-75 Calories)

Total Calories in: 1,219
Total Calories out: 1,499
Net Calories: -280

After yesterday's ranting I'm feeling oodles better today, largely due to a really good sleep, followed by a decent workout, after which I swam (day 1 of week of swimming TICKED) and had a nice steam. I didn't do anything adventurous today with food, which I think is a big help in sticking to a regular routine. Don't get me wrong - I love to cook and try new recipes, but for day to day, having some set staple meals that I know WORK saves me the mental time spent thinking about and wondering about food. So what are these foods...

  • My split pea soup that I made over the weekend is so good and simple and easy and delicious. 
  • Omelets and frittatas - they've been my standby for years and I've never gotten sick of them.

I am now drawing a blank. Week of omelets then? I'll think about this again when I'm hungry.

In other news, I pulled something in my left thigh it seems because I felt a very sharp pain when I tried to do deadlifts today. I've also felt a pain in my hip flexor for the last week or two that's a bit annoying. However, I had a go at a little RUNNING today - my second running attempt post knee surgery. It's odd, the knee is fine with the running. But other activities (swimming) and I still feel the strain. But yeah, the running makes me optimistic. I'm not doing much - maybe a minute or two at a time, with long walking breaks in between, but it gets me excited that I might be able to run for real again in the not so distant future. 

Other things I've been thinking about - I need to rejig my notion of "reward". They say food-based rewards are the worst kind and I think I'm starting to get it. I really want to break myself of the tendency to go way overboard on the weekend, so I'm trying to change my way of thinking. I read yesterday on Jes's wonderful eating appalacia blog that BAKING helps her stay on track (as does swimming - gmta!). And it got me thinking, "that's sorta what sourdough is for me." But then I started thinking of other things in my life I don't do because I don't feel like I have the time. Particularly: GOING PLACES AND DOING THINGS. Like I've been wanting to CAMP all summer and I just haven't made the plans because I feel like I can't afford to take the time. Total bullshit! I've had this mindset for YEARS: always feeling like there isn't enough time to stop, rest and be in the moment. Somehow this mindset doesn't factor into my capacity for drinking enough to have a hangover, but nevermind. So here's one way to reward myself for "good behaviour": allow myself the mental freedom to do things that take time but are thoroughly rewarding, such as camping, mushroom forays, museums and so forth.

But the other thing I thought about after Jes's baking post is that "good behaviour" doesn't have to be "extreme behaviour". In fact, anyone will tell you I seem for the most part the pillar of moderate eating - I don't tend to add sugar or butter things and I never eat cakes or chocolates or anything (but I'll eat piles and piles of fruit - come on, it's all sugar!). See, it's mental. So maybe this feeling awesome business is all an exercise in living in the moment. It's not about restraint or rewards, but intention and being deliberate. 

Having said that, in this particular moment, I'm starting to feel a bit brain dead. That's enough deep thinking for today. 

It it has to be a desk breakfast...

Split Pea Soup

Day 67

I feel like I need a do-over. On Day 58 (17 Sept) I set myself a goal of counting calories for a week, until 23 Sept, and then have a "post-portem" on my learnings. So that's what I'm trying to do, and I'm having an incredibly hard time doing it.

It should be really easy for me to stick to a routine and avoid problem foods and drinks. I live by myself, in the middle of no where, and have few social pressures to contend with. And yet, I still find myself slipping, maybe because as much as I don't have social pressure, I also don't have social support, and so I have no one to be accountable to except myself. 

I actually did really well throughout the week of the experiment. But when it was over, it I totally reverted to the extreme. What HAVE I learned? Well, I suppose I've always known that I have a tendency to go over the top. It's totally mental because I can be SO controlled about what I eat and drink, and then I decide to let got for a moment, but then I REALLY let go, and this can last for days. And then I end up feeling like I do today - tired, crappy and missing how awesome I felt the week before. 

I'm leaving out the details, but for me it has a lot to do with drinking and desserts. When I don't have either of those things, I feel good. When I do have those things, I feel momentarily good, then bad for a lot longer. 

I need to change my way of thinking. I'm in a bad habit at the moment, where I'm super mega healthy all week long and then it's Friday and I think "celebration time" and I go over the top, and this leads into Saturday... and Sunday... and... I need to not do that anymore. I need to maintain a level head all week. I need to not find myself in these little holes I dig myself into. I need to find something else to anticipate. 

So I think tomorrow I will try the Calorie-counting thing again (do over), for another week, and then what's my goal here? I suppose I need to find something to look forward to, which sounds totally depressing. What are the things I value most in life? What are the things I miss lately? Spending time on my writing, my photos, that stuff, because I've been so busy with work. Maybe that's the reward. Or maybe I should be grander. Take a goddam holiday for a change. Go camping. DO something. Could it be in the mire of all of this, I'm languishing?  

Day 63

Roast butternut squash and chickpea salad

Energy in:

  • Breakfast: Muesli with banana, strawberry, raspberries and yogurt (209 Calories)
  • Lunch: Roast butternut squash and chickpea salad with raspberries and balsamic (300 Calories)
  • Snack: Pear and protein smoothie with cinnamon (251 Calories)
  • Dinner: Tempeh chili with avocado, pickled jalapenos and spinach; a few strawbs (366 Calories) 
Energy out:
  • Swim, 2250m, 55min (-291 Calories)
  • Walk, 30min (-75 Calories)
Total Calories in: 1,137
Total Calories out: 1,610
Net Calories: -473

Something isn't right today. I was feeling iffy this morning, with no appetite. No desire for anything eggy or cheesy or creamy or sour or ... nothing appealed (I hope it wasn't the fault of yesterday's cauliflower cheese frittata!). Towards lunch I was regaining my appetite, and I wanted something just totally fresh, but warming (I always feel a little chilly after a swim). So I made a salad based on a Rachel Demuth recipe with roasted butternut squash and chickpeas. For lack of pomegranate seeds, I added raspberries. It was good. Perfect. But after a post-lunch walk I was still hungry, so I went for what I usually go for: a smoothie. This one with pear (vs my usual banana and berry). After that I felt totally BLAH. Was it the pear? The fresh pear picked from the orchard? Say it ain't so? Or was it the smoothie? Come to think of it, I was feeling well enough yesterday afternoon (post cauliflower cheese frittata) to want a smoothie, but after that it was downhill. So is my body starting to reject whey protein? What is going on? No appetite at dinner. Had a bit of tempeh chile (fabulous freezer food), hoping it would reignite the internal fires. No dice. I am laying in bed waiting to feel normal again. 

On a separate note, I used the steam room for the first time today at the gym. It was REALLY nice, a great way to warm up and relax after a long swim. And might I add, a great swim - I pushed things a bit with the knee but it felt good and I was in the zone. And I think my knee liked the steam. Will be doing that again. Maybe even tomorrow, where the plan is to lift heavy things and maybe see if I can still do two pull-ups. But I fear the ramifications of today's lack of food (as indicated by my Caloric intake). I might be a total zombie in the morning. In which case, breakfast first, no big deal. 

And speaking of breakfasts, I have a strange desire to make pancakes lately, and am looking for a good SOURDOUGH pancake recipe, ideally including some buckwheat flour. Suggestions welcome.

There is muesli there Tempeh Chili

Day 62

Cauliflower Cheese Frittata

Energy in:

  • Breakfast: Last of the breakfast barley with bananas and walnuts (373 Calories)
  • Lunch: Cauliflower cheese frittata with ploughman's chutney and mixed salad (318 Calories)
  • Snack: Strawberry banana smoothie (146 Calories)
  • Dinner: Carrot & walnut tofu neatballs with toast, avocado, giardiniera, broccoli and 150ml glass of red (572 Calories)
Energy out:
  • Swim - 2000m, 50min (-264 Calories) 
  • Walk 30m (-75 Calories)

Total Calories in: 1,408
Total Calories out: 1,586
Net Calories: -178

I don't know what got into me with the cauliflower cheese frittata. But it sounded like a good idea, and was oddly inspired by the two in one pie, a meal I found fairly disgusting. But it was like, I saw potential, and wanted to make it better. And actually, the frittata WAS good, with breadcrumbs on top and a bit of ploughman's chutney... mmm. But I don't think my body is used to eating that much cheese. There wasn't even much cheese going on (maybe 25g of strong cheddar?), but it was enough to make my tummy feel funny. Or maybe something else was going on. Who knows. The day was sort of an off day anyway because I woke up at 2am due to creatures scratching in the walls, and then at 4:30am due to rat dog yappy to have pee. And then I couldn't fall back asleep. And then I left the house at 5:30am to get fuel, milk and coffee filters, then have a swim. It all felt really surreal. Though tired, I was full of anxiety for some reason, and I swam like the dickens. Then had the most pathetic neatball sub for dinner. But it was good and happy making. Probably because it had giardiniera. 

More breakfast barley

Cauliflower Cheese Frittata

Silly sandwich

Day 61

Besan cheela with eggplant bharta and a minty carrot relish

Energy in:

  • Breakfast: Breakfast barley with bananas, walnuts and milk (348 Calories)
  • Lunch: Besan cheela with eggplant bharta, minty carrot relish and mango chutney (402 Calories)
  • Snack: Pear, protein smoothie, tea (192 Calories)
  • Dinner: Fried egg with sauteed mushrooms, onions, kale, and cherry tomatoes (376 Calories)
  • Snack: Yogurt with strawberries and raspberries (81 Calories) 
Energy out:
  • Weightlifting (-161 Calories)
  • Walk (-76 Calories)
Total Calories in: 1,420
Total Calories out: 1,473
Net Calories: -53

IMG_2144

Besan cheela with eggplant bharta and a minty carrot relish

Eggs with mushrooms, onions, tomatoes and kale

Day 60

Barley porridge

Energy in:
  • Breakfast: Barley porridge with apple, raisins and banana (256 Calories)
  • Lunch: Leftover Spanish-style prawns and fennel with french beans, sourdough rye bread and avocado (457 Calories)
  • Snack: Banana and raspberry smoothie - don't think I'm crazy about raspberries in a smoothie; seems sort of a waste; also cup of tea with milk (198 Calories)
  • Dinner: Carrot and walnut tofu neatballs with sourdough rye bread, avocado, giardiniera, tomato sauce and broccoli - like a weird deconstructed vegetarian sub sandwich - awesome (446 Calories)
  • Snack attack: Apple (95 Calories)
Energy out: 
  • Two walks: one shorty in the AM and one longer stroll in the afternoon post lunch ( Calories)

Total Calories in: 1,450
Total Calories out: 1,477
Net Calories: -27

Skipped the gym in favour of work-related productivity and a morning walk in the sun - sun which quickly turned to cool mist in the afternoon, but felt somewhat refreshing during my post-lunch afternoon stroll. I'm trying to be uber-productive at the moment on my "business"; there is much to get in order, and I seem to be working weekends and evenings in the meantime. This is fine but I don't want this to last forever. I miss having time for writing and gardening. Then again, people I know who own businesses seem to work ALL the time, regardless. So maybe this is just my constant? I mean, if you're driven to do something, you just do it - right?

So, with this focus on productivity comes added emphasis on feeling awesome all of the time. Amazing how a most of feeling awesome boils down to getting a good night's sleep, and a good sleep has lots to do with eating well and avoiding alcohol, and eating well has lots to do with planning and intention, and well... it's all a chain reaction this feeling awesome stuff. And every day it starts again. Every day's a new opportunity to get it "right". 

Today felt right. Funny, I didn't do a whole lot of cooking today, nor did I go to the gym, two foundations of my existence these days that I seem to "miss" when I go without. Yet I actually felt better than usual. Walking for pleasure is one of the best things ever. And on today in particular, I must have had a lot of thinking to do because I could have just walked forever. That I wasn't cooking (one of my favourite forms of procrastination) meant that I was working and getting stuff done and not obsessing over food, something I love, but can interfere with practical matters like growing a business. Need I mention the awesomeness of leftovers during times like these?

There's still much to do. But on this Monday, I feel like I'm off to a good start. 

Two other things: (1) I did two pull-ups on Saturday - a milestone. (2) I have no plans whatsoever for the next few weeks. This feeling of not having to BE anywhere has put me at great ease. Must make the most of it.

Barley porridge

Not much to look at

Carrot & Walnut Tofu Neatballs

Day 59

Innards of my funny sandwich

Energy in:

  • Breakfast: Sourdough buckwheat pancakes with bananas, blackberries, yogurt and homemade blackberry plum jam (334 Calories)
  • Lunch: Egg and portobello mushroom open-face sandwich with mayo, avocado, red onion, tomato and pickles - pretty awesome (347 Calories)
  • Snack: Banana and strawberry smoothie (218 Calories)
  • Dinner: Besan cheela (indian chickpea pancake) with eggplant bharta and apricot ginger chutney; glass (or two) of white, Domäne Wachau Grüner Veltliner 'Terraces' 2009/10 Wachau, Austria (616 Calories)
Energy out:
  • Swim: 2250m, ~50min ( Calories)
  • Walk: ~30mins (Calories)
Total Calories in: 1,515
Total Calories out: 1,596
Net Calories: -82

Sourdough pancakes

Fried egg mushroom thing

Besan cheela with eggplant bharta

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